My family is slowly losing a great woman - we're watching her slip each day, and it is harder than anything I've felt to this point in my life. That sort of pain, as many of my friends know, takes a toll on you. It weighs you down till you can do nothing but stop, and sit, and cry.
But, because I have (as we all have) obligations to keep, I (we) push on and do what it is we need to do. We go to work, we make dinner, we meet with our friends and we go to events we're scheduled to be at. We keep our mundane promises and we keep our SCA promises.
My SCA promises include painting scrolls and being present and active as our Barony's Chatelaine. Even while out of town these promises sat in my mind, reminders of things to do when I got home. I walked by my scribal instruments last night after a long day of flying and I smiled. Painting engulfs me, and I can forget for a short while everything else and just create. I can create something that will hang in someone's home, something they'll show their relatives and friends, something that will help them remember with pride an achievement they earned. That knowledge is a great motivator.
So that's what I'll be doing over the next few days - immersing myself in painting, letting the brush strokes help me deal with realities, and not crying on my work. ;)